Overprotectivenese

The sunlight filtered through the stained-glass windows of the Mushroom Kingdom’s grand new castle, casting vibrant patterns across the polished floors. In the center of the main foyer, Mario was currently occupied with what he considered the most important task of the century: trying to see how many mini-marshmallows he could shove into his nose before they started falling out of his ears.

"Ooh, look-a me! I’m a snow-man!" Mario giggled, his eyes crossed as he balanced a marshmallow on the tip of his mustache.

He was blissfully unaware of the atmosphere in the room. Normally, his antics would be met with a chorus of groans, a facepalm from SMG4, or perhaps a swift kick from Saiko. But today, things were different. Very different.

Leaning against a nearby pillar, Saiko Bichitaru wasn't looking at her phone or sharpening her hammer. Instead, her gaze was fixed intently on the plumber, a strange, soft smile tugging at the corners of her lips. Next to her, Meggy Spletzer had stopped her shadow-boxing routine entirely. She was resting her chin in her hands, watching Mario struggle with a marshmallow with an expression of pure adoration.

Even Melony, who was usually fast asleep on the nearest sofa, was wide awake. She sat on the edge of her seat, her eyes sparkling as she watched Mario trip over his own feet and let out a soft "Wahoo!"

Behind the snacks counter, Karen the cat adjusted her glasses. She usually had zero patience for Mario’s nonsense, but today, her tail was swishing rhythmically. She ignored a customer’s order for a latte, her eyes locked on the red-clad idiot as he began to hum a nonsensical tune about spaghetti.

"He’s so... precious," Meggy whispered, her voice uncharacteristically high-pitched.

"Like a little strawberry," Saiko added, her grip tightening on the handle of her hammer—not in anger, but in a defensive reflex.

Mario, sensing none of this, wandered over to the large computer desk where SMG4 was frantically typing away at his latest video script. Mario picked up a nearby bob-omb paperweight and began to bounce it off the top of SMG4’s head.

"Hey, SMG4! Look! I’m a hacker! Boop-beep-bop!" Mario shouted, poking the monitor with a greasy finger.

SMG4’s eye twitched. He hadn't slept in three days, and the sound of Mario’s voice was like a cheese grater against his brain. "Mario, for the love of everything holy, be quiet! I am trying to work! Go play in a ditch or something!"

The silence that followed was deafening.

Mario’s joyful expression instantly withered. His lower lip trembled, and his shoulders slumped. A small, pathetic whimper escaped his throat as he dropped the paperweight. "Oh... okay. Mario sorry. Mario will be a quiet boy."

He turned away, looking like a kicked puppy, his head hanging low.

The temperature in the room seemed to drop twenty degrees. SMG4 felt a chill run down his spine, but it wasn't from the air conditioning. He looked up from his screen and froze.

Meggy, Saiko, Melony, Tari, and Karen were all staring at him. Their eyes weren't just angry; they were predatory. It was a collective "death glare" that could have melted a hole through the castle’s stone walls.

"Uh... guys?" SMG4 stammered, pulling his hat down over his eyes. "What’s with the faces? He was being annoying!"

"He was being enthusiastic," Saiko corrected, her voice low and dangerous.

"He’s just a little guy," Tari squeaked, though her eyes remained narrowed at the meme-maker.

Before SMG4 could defend himself, the girls moved as one unit. They bypassed the desk and swarmed Mario.

"It’s okay, Mario," Meggy said, reaching out to pat his shoulder. "You didn't do anything wrong. You want to go get some ramen?"

"Or we could go to the arcade?" Tari suggested, gently taking his hand. "I’ll let you win at Smash Each Other in the Ass Brothers."

Mario blinked, his sadness momentarily forgotten as he found himself surrounded by the girls. "Ooh? You guys want to play with Mario?"

Luigi, who had been dusting a nearby vase, stopped mid-stroke. His jaw hit the floor. He had spent his entire life watching his brother get chased by monsters, angry mobs, and disgruntled shopkeepers. He had never, in all his years, seen Mario get this kind of positive attention—especially not all at once.

"M-Mario?" Luigi stammered. "Since when are you... popular?"

"I don't know, Luigi! It’s-a magic!" Mario laughed, feeling the soft fabric of Melony’s cloak as she leaned against his side.

The rest of the crew—Fishy Boopkins and Bob—were equally stunned. Bob, never one to let a moment of sincerity go unpunished, swaggered forward with his blades glinting.

"Lol, what is this garbage?" Bob jeered, waving a hand dismissively at the group. "Why are you losers hanging out with this fat sack of lard? He smells like old lasagna and failure. Hey, Mario! Your mustache looks like two caterpillars having a mid-life crisis! You're a total dumbass!"

Bob waited for the usual reaction—Mario getting angry, or SMG4 telling them both to shut up.

Instead, he heard a sound that made his non-existent blood run cold. It was the sound of heavy, deliberate footsteps.

The girls shifted. They didn't just step in front of Mario; they formed a physical wall. Melony, usually the softest of the bunch, stepped forward. Her Fierce Deity mask wasn't on, but her eyes held a terrifying, glowing intensity. She didn't say a word. She simply stared at Bob with a cold, unblinking gaze that promised a very painful death.

"Uh... why is the melon girl looking at me like she wants to harvest my soul?" Bob asked, his voice cracking.

"Apologize," Saiko commanded, resting her massive hammer on her shoulder. The head of the hammer cracked the floor tiles.

"What? No! It’s Mario! We rip on him every day!" Bob argued, looking toward SMG4 for backup.

SMG4, however, was busy trying to climb up the curtains to get away from the radiating aura of protective rage.

"I said," Karen stepped forward, her claws slowly extending from her fingertips, "apologize to the customer. He is a valued member of this establishment, and your verbal harassment is a violation of castle policy."

"Since when do you care about policy?!" Bob yelled.

Mario peeked out from behind Melony’s cape, his eyes wide with curiosity. He reached out and tugged on Melony’s sleeve. "Is Bob-omb being a meanie-weenie?"

Melony turned her head back just enough to give Mario a sweet, angelic smile. "Don't worry, Mario. The bad trash bag is going to go away now."

She turned back to Bob, her expression instantly flipping back to a demonic scowl. She took one step forward.

"Okay, okay! Holy crap!" Bob held up his blades in a defensive gesture, backing away toward the exit. "Mario is a beautiful princess! His mustache is majestic! Please don't kill me, I have a career in rapping to fail at!"

Bob turned and bolted out the front doors, his screams echoing through the courtyard.

Mario clapped his hands together. "Yay! The trash can did a runner!"

Tari smiled softly, leaning her head against Mario’s arm. "He won't bother you anymore, Mario. We'll make sure of it."

Luigi walked over, scratching his head in confusion. "Guys, I’m glad you’re being nice to him and all, but... aren't you being a little... much? You’re acting like he’s a rare diamond or something."

Meggy turned to Luigi, her eyes narrowing slightly. "He *is* a rare diamond, Luigi. He’s the heart of this team. And frankly, we’ve realized we haven't been giving him the respect he deserves."

"I just want to give him a hug," Tari whispered, looking like she was about to explode from the cuteness of Mario trying to eat his own hat.

"He is quite... sturdy," Karen remarked, her eyes tracing the round shape of the plumber. "Reliable. Like a good brand of cat litter."

Mario, completely oblivious to the underlying possessiveness of the group, just beamed at them all. "I love you guys! You’re almost as good as spaghetti!"

The girls all let out a collective "Aww," and the circle tightened.

SMG4 peeked out from behind the curtains, watching as the girls escorted Mario toward the kitchen, likely to feed him his weight in pasta. He looked at Luigi, who looked back with an expression of pure bewilderment.

"Luigi," SMG4 whispered. "I think we might be in trouble."

"Why?" Luigi asked.

"Because," SMG4 said, watching Saiko glare at a Toad who dared to walk too close to Mario, "I don't think they're ever going to let him go."

Down in the kitchen, Mario was seated at the head of the table like a king. Meggy was boiling water, Saiko was chopping vegetables with terrifying speed, and Melony was simply sitting next to him, holding his hand as if he might float away if she let go.

Mario took a deep breath, the scent of tomato sauce filling the air. "Mama mia... this is the best day ever!"

He didn't notice the way the girls exchanged glances—glances that said they would fight a god, or perhaps an entire army, just to keep that stupid, happy smile on his face. Mario was their idiot, and heaven help anyone who tried to tell him otherwise.