Mario returns!

The last thing Mario remembered was the cold. It hadn't been a scary cold, like the kind that comes from a blizzard or a ghost's touch. It had been a quiet, heavy cold that felt like a thick blanket being pulled over his head. He remembered the blurry faces of his friends, the sound of Luigi’s sobbing, and the smell of a final, lukewarm bowl of pasta that he didn't have the strength to finish. Then, there was nothing but a long, peaceful nap.

Suddenly, Mario’s lungs burned with a sharp, frantic intake of air.

"WAHOO!"

The plumber sat bolt upright, his gloved hands clutching at his chest. He wasn't in a hospital bed. He wasn't in a coffin. He was lying on the floor of his old bedroom in the castle, the sunlight streaming through the window in thick, dusty beams. He blinked his large, round eyes, looking at his belly. It was still there, pleasantly round and encased in his signature red shirt and blue overalls.

"Mario... Mario is alive?" he whispered, his voice cracking. He poked his cheek. It felt like rubbery dough. He pinched his arm. "Ow! It’s-a me! I’m-a not a ghost! I don’t even have a halo!"

He scrambled to his feet, his legs feeling a bit wobbly like gelatin. He felt a sudden, overwhelming surge of energy—the kind of energy that usually preceded a massive explosion or a quest for spaghetti. But more than hunger, he felt a desperate, aching need to see them. He needed to see the green brother who always worried too much. He needed to see the blue-and-white meme guardian who yelled at him. Most of all, he wanted to see Melony, the fierce deity-mask-wearing girl he had come to love like his own daughter.

Mario didn't bother with the stairs. He slid down the banister, tumbled into a heap at the bottom, and scrambled toward the main foyer of the new SMG4 Castle. He reached the heavy oak doors of the main lounge and stopped. His heart—which was definitely beating again—thumped against his ribs like a trapped Bob-omb.

He pressed his ear to the wood. He could hear voices. They sounded older, more tired, but they were unmistakably them.

"I can’t believe it’s been five years," a voice said. It was Saiko, her tone uncharacteristically soft.

"The castle still feels too quiet without the sound of something constantly breaking," SMG4 added with a heavy sigh.

Mario’s hand trembled on the doorknob. Five years? He had been gone for five years? He felt a pang of guilt. He had missed so many memes. He had missed so many dinners. Slowly, he pushed the door open just a crack.

The room was decorated with streamers, but they weren't bright and colorful. They were a muted gold and white. A large portrait of Mario sat on an easel in the center of the room, surrounded by flowers and, touchingly, several unopened cans of Chef Boyardee. The whole gang was there: SMG4, SMG3, Saiko, Tari, Bob, Fishy Boopkins, Meggy, Luigi, and Melony.

Melony was sitting on a sofa, hugging a plushie of a penguin. She looked taller, her face more mature, though she still had that sleepy, ethereal glow about her. Luigi sat next to her, clutching a handkerchief, his mustache drooping with sadness.

"I just wish," Luigi sniffed, "I just wish he could have seen the new garden I planted for him. It’s all red peppers and tomatoes."

Mario couldn't hold it back anymore. His brain, which usually operated at the speed of a dial-up modem, was currently flooded with pure, unadulterated love. He pushed the door open wide, stumbling into the room with his arms outstretched.

"Hey! Why is everyone so sad? Did the spaghetti store close down?"

The silence that followed was absolute. It was the kind of silence that usually happened right before a universe-resetting glitch.

SMG4 dropped his coffee mug. It shattered on the floor, splashing brown liquid across his boots, but he didn't even flinch. Bob’s eye-glow flickered wildly. Meggy’s jaw dropped so low it looked like it might hit the floor.

For a long ten seconds, nobody moved. They looked at the plump man in the red hat as if he were a hallucination brought on by collective grief.

"M-Mario?" Luigi whispered, his voice trembling so hard it was barely audible.

Melony stood up slowly, her eyes wide. Tears began to well up instantly, spilling over her cheeks. "Dad?"

Mario gave a wide, toothy, and incredibly stupid grin. "It’s-a me! Mario! I got bored of being dead! It was very dark and there were no snacks!"

The dam broke.

"MARIO!" Luigi shrieked, a mix of a scream and a sob. He launched himself across the room with the speed of a heat-seeking missile, tackling his brother into a pile of decorative cushions.

"Oof! Easy on the overalls, Luigi!" Mario laughed, though his own eyes were starting to sting.

Melony wasn't far behind. She didn't walk; she used her deity powers to dash forward, wrapping her arms around both brothers. She buried her face in Mario’s red shirt, sobbing inconsolably. The fierce warrior who could slice through dimensions was currently reduced to a weeping child holding onto her father.

"You’re back... you’re really back..." she wailed, her grip tightening as if she expected him to vanish into smoke if she let go.

"I’m here, Melony," Mario said, his voice softening as he patted her green hair. "Don't cry, or you'll make Mario's shirt all soggy, and then I'll look like a wet noodle."

The rest of the crew surged forward. Meggy was the next to arrive, slamming into the hug and crying into Mario’s shoulder. SMG4 was right behind her, laughing hysterically while tears streamed down his face, wiping his eyes with his sleeve.

"You idiot!" SMG4 yelled, though there was no malice in it. "You absolute, moronic, wonderful idiot! How are you even here? This defies every law of logic and memes!"

"I dunno," Mario said, hugging Tari and Saiko as they joined the pile. "I saw a bright light, but then I smelled garlic bread coming from this direction, so I just walked back."

"That is the most Mario thing I have ever heard in my entire life," SMG3 muttered, standing on the edge of the group and trying to look cool, though he was aggressively wiping his eyes with his cape. "Welcome back, you fat Italian."

"HEY! Who are you calling fat?" Mario shouted happily. "I’m-a 'horizontally gifted'!"

Bob leaned over the group, his blades retracted for once. "OH MY GOD, DOES THIS MEAN WE DON'T HAVE TO PAY FOR THE FUNERAL FLOWERS ANYMORE? BECAUSE I STILL OWE THE FLORIST FIFTY BUCKS."

"Shut up, Bob!" everyone yelled in unison, before descending back into a chorus of laughter and crying.

Mario sat in the middle of the floor, buried under his friends. He felt Luigi’s shaking hands holding his arm, and Melony’s head resting on his chest. For the first time in a long time, the world felt right. The colors seemed brighter, the air smelled better, and even though he knew he’d probably cause a disaster within the next twenty minutes, he didn't care.

"I missed you guys," Mario said, his voice cracking as he finally let a few tears fall. "Even the scary ones. And even the ones that smell like trash."

"We missed you more, Red," Meggy said, pulling back to look at him. "The world was just... gray without you."

Melony looked up, her eyes red and puffy but sparkling with joy. "Are you staying? For real?"

Mario leaned forward and booped her nose. "Mario isn't going anywhere. Unless there’s a sale on pizza. But then I’ll come right back!"

Luigi hugged him again, squeezing so hard Mario’s eyes nearly popped out. "I’m never letting you go on a solo mission again. I’m tagging you with a GPS. I’m glueing us together!"

"Mama mia," Mario chuckled, patting Luigi’s back. "Everything is gonna be okay, Lu. Mario is back, and I’m-a hungry enough to eat a whole Koopa!"

As the sun set over the Mushroom Kingdom, the castle wasn't filled with the somber silence of an anniversary. Instead, it was filled with the sounds of a chaotic, messy, and loud celebration. There were plates of spaghetti piled high, memes being shared at maximum volume, and in the center of it all sat a very happy, very dumb, and very much alive plumber, surrounded by the family that had never truly let him go.

Mario took a massive bite of a meatball and looked around the room. He didn't know how he was back, and he didn't care about the logistics. He was home.

"Hey, SMG4!" Mario called out through a mouthful of pasta.

"Yeah, Mario?" the guardian asked, smiling warmly from across the table.

"I think I left the oven on five years ago. Is that bad?"

The silence returned for a split second before the entire room erupted into a frantic scramble toward the kitchen, led by a screaming SMG4 and a laughing Mario.

Yes, everything was exactly as it should be.